Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Wondering Wednesday

I have to wonder what makes a person seriously want to give up on life and take their life?  I have been down and out and at one time did not care if I lived or died, but it was never a option to take my life in my hands and kill my self.  There has to be a deep, deep place of depression for someone to take their life.  I think it is a very selfish person that will do this, but then I think they are not in their right mind to think it through and make the right decision……so how does one get so far gone in the pits of despair that they kill them self? It seems they cannot not fathom the future, that their thinking is abstract for today only, but they are adults and should be able to think past today, I understand teen agers because their brain processes that way but in adult hood you should be able to process. When I worked at Living Hope this was my favorite kind of patient, because there is always hope, most were hopeless and were mad they did not die, angry at life, in time we were able to help them regroup and have a reason to live and some new coping skills. Then I have thought it is the person’s way to stay in control of what happens to them, they use this as a method to keep control over their loved ones and friends, if you do not do what I say, I will kill my self, that always makes me angry to see this and is so unfair to the family, I say… one can be responsible for that person’s life, if they kill them self that is their decision and the family has to set a boundary and live by it, knowing the out come could be death for their love one, but you cannot be trapped by this type behavior.  No one can make someone take their life by their actions. This decision is made by he person who takes their life and they can choose not to.  Happiness is a choice for all of us,  we all have hard times and times of rejection BUT we choose to over come it, when someone can not choose that then they are sick and need of some help.  As you can tell I am processing my thought in writing, not knowing for sure if this is right or wrong just my thoughts. I have a friend who purposely over dosed, I ask you to pray for her, it is a miracle she is alive, she was serious and took enough meds to be dead, she does not want to live, this friend is a happy person with some family problems but a beautiful woman and a believer in the Lord, she has had her share if not more, of problems, some she brings on her self, like we all do,  she has a decision to make choose life or choose death, no one can make it for her and no one can make her die, if she chooses death it is her choice, one little problem, it is not time apparently for her to go home and until it is she will just harm her self and continue to live a miserable life, God said there is a time to die and a time to live, it is HIS timing not ours, so I have seen where the person makes their life a life of a vegetable and continues to live till God says its time.  I pray this does not happen with my friend, please keep her in your prayers.  Pray her family will have the strength to stand up against this control and manipulation by her, and be able to release her to the Lord so He can do HIs work in her and show her a reason to live……tks for listening to me express my self….Hugs

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