Saturday, April 21, 2012

40 years, six children, 15 grand children!!!!!!!

Steve and I at our reception. I was a Sailor's wife, can you tell?

 Steve seeing Alicia for the first time.
It is hard to believe that forty years ago I married, at that time not to the man I was in love with but to Steve Averitt, a man I did not know.  I think God had arranged my marriage, and I am ever so thankful for that!  I  had broke up with my financee' when Steve ask me out, we did not know each other, but our dear friend Bill Brown was a mutual friend of ours, he was in the Navy with Steve, Bill was my best friend and I wrote him every day, giving him the highs and lows of me and my financee' problems. Bill let Steve read all my letters:(  Bill called to see if I wanted to go out with Steve the Friday night they came home from boot camp, then out Saturday night and Skiing on Sunday, since I was broke up I said yes.  In the mean time me and my finacee' got back together and I broke my Friday night date with Steve but got him a date with my friend Susan Toland Cookus, then I went out with My financee' and Steve and his date and Bill, we went to eat Pizza , my financee' took me home early to be with Bill, which totally made me angry, the next day I went swimming with my finacee' and he said he and Bill were going out Sat. night, I said fine , so I went out with Steve.  That night change the course of my life totally for the good,  when Steve and I went out he ask me to marry him, my financee' had kept telling me he was going into the Navy with Bill and I would cry my heart out, so I thought, we will see who goes to California and I told Steve, yes I would marry him........... the next morning we went to church, they had a roster you signed, so I was going to sign for him and had to ask how to spell Averitt, then he went and talked to my daddy, who was not a easy person to talk to, much less ask to marry their daughter, my daddy liked Steve from the very first, he trusted him and said yes.....this was not the norm for my daddy he had ran many a boys off! I had a new Pontiac Firebird, daddy said we could take it but would need to buy it on payments, Steve said we did not need it, he had a car, then daddy gave it to us, we married that Thursday.  I never talked to my finance again during those days, he was upset talked to mother and Steve but I knew if I talked to him I would not go through with it.  Walking down the isle my daddy said, if you do not want to do this tell me, we can turn around now:) I can buy you a new horse, but I went through with it.....not for the right say the least I did not love Steve but was in love with my financee'......Steve and Bill drove to California, Chula Vista got a apt. and I flew down...I loved the apt. and Bill lived with us so I was ok, but so home sick I could not go a day without crying, it was all I could do to stay there, if Bill had not been there I may not have. I was 18 never been away from home and Bill was the only person I knew. I had a year supply of birth control pills, first thing mother and Kay did, took me to gyn got me checked, got pills:)  Remember all this happened from Sunday till wedding on Thursday:) Steve thought they made me cry and said quit taking them so I did and got pregnant with Alicia that June, Bill was stationed else where and Steve and I moved to Alameda, I was so sick, had major problems with pregnancy, was at hospital and they were going to do a DNC they said, which was really a abortion, but I said no, I want to go home, this was in August and I did, was on bed rest, very anemic and sick, my daddy was hurt in a construction accident  that October on his 59th birthday, he past away 10 days later, I was so thankful I had come home.  Steve  sent overseas, he came home for the funeral then shipped back out, I lived with mother, at this time I was falling in love with Steve but still had strong feelings for my financee', we had seen each other out places and it was very hard for me.  I had a husband that I could actually tell him my feelings, and he loved me any way, had no ideal how important that was! When Alicia was four months old Steve came home from overseas and his mother past away shortly after that and he was stationed in Little Rock due to family deaths till he finished his time. I got pregnant with Sean, then had a miscarriage between Sean and my third baby Alex, Steve had a Vasectomy while I was pregnant with Alex, in 1976 I got saved and God totally change me inside and out, we were ready for a divorce at that time, and several other times. God changed my heart for Steve and being a young mother. I began to find fulfillment in motherhood and being a wife, God changed everything about me.  I longed to have another baby, I was scheduled for a hysterectomy, had gone to see Dr. Simmons and he said honey you are pregnant! I took Steve straight to the Dr. who did his surgery three years ago, Yes he had sperm and Yes I was pregnant! I was so excited, we had Hannah!  Then when she was four months old, I had this sick feeling, I knew I was pregnant again, I thought how can I love another baby, but then came Jared and it was instant love for him:)) Then I had my hysterectomy and then came April! OK, so that was a miracle of the Lord through adoption:)  To say the least I have had a full forty years of marriage, had children in school for 30 years, have only lived alone with Steve for a year, we were settled into our routine of having our time when we moved mother in with us, I think our life style prepared us to be ok with someone always there.  I would not change anything about our life, we had had our struggles in out marriage, we work on our marriage daily, just finished 10 months of marriage counseling, we do marriage counseling,  we have learned to work though our struggles and to communicate with each other, Steve is my best friend, we have been brutally honest with each other over the years, forgave each other, decided to take divorce out of our vocabulary.  I honestly do not know how I would make it with out his help with mother, he loves her as I do, he loves all our babies and grand babies as much as I do, we are two peas in a pod, God sure knew what I needed when He stopped MY plans and put Steve in my life.  By the way I even had a wedding in Oak Forrest Methodist church, and had maid of honor and best man, reception! A beautiful wedding dress! Thanks to my sister who knew how to do weddings, she even had a real wedding, for her Barbe and Ken doll, it included real pony carriage rides up and down the alley!! YAHOO FOR FORTY YEARS! Can't wait for the next forty!  I love you with all my heart and soul Steve Averitt!!!!! Thank you God for knowing what I need, Thank you mother for praying for God to intervene in my life!! I was for sure on the wrong track.........................where would we be without praying mama's!!

No comments: