Monday, October 1, 2012

The last leg of the Journey

If you know me you already know Mother past away Friday Sept. 28th at 6:30 am, with Kay and I and Steve by her side, the week was a hard one, emotionally, physically, mentally, but in the end it was total peace, as mother took her last breaths, I sang her into Heaven, the song sweep over my soul, sweep over my soul, sweet Jesus sweep over my soul, my rest is complete while I sit at your feet, Sweet Jesus sweep over my soul..............Mother's actual death was so sweet..........I am so thankful God let me be apart of escorting her into His arms of love.   I will always treasure it.

I have been so blessed with meals, family, friends, have not wanted for a thing, all my family and my sister's family were here today for lunch and we went went for a private viewing of mother, I had gone yesterday with mother's friend and hair dresser Sherry Elmer, she did mother's hair and I did her make up, this was so healing for me, I have not been around dead people to much, but it was different, I just loved on her and we fixed her hair, in which she needed, did her make up, mother never wore much and I wanted her to look like her, her lips were a little different, but she looked beautiful. I wondered how I did that, it was so natural, I had become a parent to my mother, I cleaned her face, fixed her hair almost everyday, brushed her teeth, so it was so normal for me to get her pretty for the day,I think it must be this way when someone has a child pass away, it is normal to nurture them.  It was healing for me.

Tomorrow will be Mother's day of Celebration of her life, I will miss her so much, I will have to find a new normal for me, because she has been the number one priority in my life, above all else for the past 2.5 years, before that really because Walt was sick and for sure mother was so unhealthy, I have been blessed to have her for so long. I felt I was mother's voice for her in her care, I can honestly say I have no regrets, she got my best, Steve and everyone else got my left overs, I am looking forward to finding my new normal......................hugs

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