Still making it, but sometimes wonder how:)

Well we have settled in with mother, this week has been a hard one, it is hard to believe what a UTI Infection does in the brain of the elderly, and they are common I knew Monday something was not right, mother was too agitated and cursed, which she never does.  Kay took her to Dr. Tuesday and just like I thought she had a UTI, just beginning, started on antibiotic, she has not slept at night all week so I am looking forward to having a caregiver tomorrow night till Tuesday so I can sleep at night Plus I need to clean her carpet so on MOnday she goes to Kay and I will have the house to myself to clean, mother is OCD on anything that is not clean or straight, so I am constantly cleaning. I do like a clean house but never this clean  Tonight she was back to her normal sweet self.  I just cannot understand how it can affect her personality so much but it does, she never argues are fuses at me, but nothing pleased her. She was mad when I had to leave, just could not understand, so it makes it hard.  Wednesday night Hannah and her family came for the night, mother did enjoy seeing the grandbabies  Jenn came over for a little while with her girls, so mother got lots of good shugs and hugs, it was a PJ day for us Thursday, Hannah had to take the three younger one’s to Dr. and get shots They slept in the camper and the kids loved it, I was glad to see them all, it had been awhile since I had seen my Luke man he is crawling everywhere!! Then we got the call that Jill was being admitted in the hospital for preeclampsia, which worried me, Amelia was born at 34 weeks, so Jill is home now and resting, which is not easy with a three year old, but we are all going to help so we can keep Sydney in the tummy for a little longer, they did start with steroid shots;( so keep them in your prayers.

There have been days that I think this is too hard with mother, but that is usually when I am going on very little sleep, then God gives me fresh grace and strength to do it, I am thankful tonight has been a peaceful night, mother is more her self and already in bed, I am on my way to bed too, I do good to get four straight hours of sleep, I have a 18 year old Cali dog, dashound Mini, that wakes me up when mother doesn’t, she is almost blind and deaf, I am thinking of having her put to sleep, I do not want to but not sure I can do her and mother, will be very hard and sad for me if I have to do that.  Cali has allergy's and I cannot keep getting her shots the vet says they are bad for her, so she itches and scratches at night then gets up to be let out Mother is getting up twice and wakes up early like 4ish stays up for a hour or so then lays back down, she piddles in her room, I listen on a monitor, so no rest this week.  Work has been crazy too, but I love being busy and writing offers and closing loans Keep my family I in your prayers, Gavin will have eye surgery this next week, Jill resting, mother UTI ( urinary tract infection) God has been faithful and I know will continue to be, Had lunch with Bill and Larry Brown this week, Keep Larry in your prayers as he battles bone cancer, he is doing real goodI have known Bill since tenth grade, I had a crush on him, he did not give me the time of day then I hope to be working with him in real estate soon, not sure I can handle Bill and Steve in real estate, there is no telling what the two of them could do in selling!!  Bill lived with Steve and I when we first married, he is Alicia’s God Father. We laughed through out our lunch, he and Larry are a hoot! Larry was married to Steve’s sister Pat for 20 plus years, since they have both remarried. Tomorrow we have Cole’s third birthday and Mika’s second birthday party, Jenn is doing them both at her house as one party, will be fun, then I am going to my friend Sherry’s house to spend the night so I can sleep, sleep, sleep, Steve will go with me, April will be here with mother, I could not do this without wonderful care givers, they help so much. Even if I do not work and was home, it would be to much for me, I am not sure how people take care of someone 24/7.  Mother senses if your frustrated or tense so I give it my all to always be patient with her and smile a lot, we do laugh a lot when she is at her self, and tonight was one of those laughing nights, I am so thankful!!! hugs and nite

My day:)

Had a great week, sold some homes, listed some, mother has adjusted very well living with us and so have we.  Now I have been running 24/7, with moving mother, getting my house ready for her, work being so busy, getting her home ready for the buyer, keeping up with my other commitments I about over did it:0  Steve and I took the weekend off to our selves, today I have not dressed, just took a shower and put on nite shirt and have laid around watching NCIS and playing word with friends.  Just a slow me down day  Mother is with Connie and April this weekend she has done great, I am so thankful she is happy living with me, you never know on moving someone with Alzheimer's, but she knows where her room is and will take you there ( about 20 times a day ) she knows where her bath room is and that it is hers, at least for now she does.  We have a schedule guess it’s the mother in me, had one when the kids were little and have one now, get up about 6ish get chores done and mother will wake up about 8:30-9:00am, if early I have coffee with her then care giver comes at nine, I go to work, with my work, I am in and out but have been able to be home at four, then we talk some, I do chores and start supper, mother helps me, then we eat at 5ish, we sit down at table and have family dinner, then Steve / mother cleans kitchen while we talk, I get in my chair, she will go to her room and get things, bring them in for me to see, then she will sit on couch and look at the things she brought in, sometimes she will fix this baby dolls hair, we watch Wheel of Fortune, a lot of times I have work to do at night which is on my laptop, I do that while she just does her thing, she has started walking around entertaining herself, she loves the Averitt girls coming over, they do games and puzzles they just love on her, all three give her hugs and kisses forever then at 8:30 give night meds and she is in bed about 9ish, she will go to sleep in her own bed, she is still having some problems staying asleep, she gets up a few times a night, which is normal for this disease.  Our sleep is interrupted, in which I am getting use too, also getting use to sleeping with lights on, I like it dark, and getting use to a baby monitor, hearing mother breath and Steve Snore and the dog who sleeps beside my bed snore, its hard for me to stay asleep, but its getting better. I am a real light sleeper.   Glad I do get help some nights so I can catch up on sleep  All in all it is good, mother laughs so much more, from what I have learned Alzheimer's victims needs structure and same routine daily and we are creating that for her.  It helps me too, Steve and I are on a schedule A lot of people have said make sure we get our time,  we will do that, I know my limits, when I need to take Linda time I will, sometimes its not the timing where I can but as soon as I can I do I have great care givers and Kay has mother on Monday night and Tuesdays, which will be nice to be home by ourselves.  I am looking forward to making memories for me, at night bedtime ritual, we put PJ’s on, brush teeth which is a ordeal then listen to her music box, she loves her curio, we look at the things in it, then she goes through pics of her family, she names them most of the time, which is great then she says am I sleeping in here by my self?  I say yes, and you love it you sleep so much better, she says, I do?? then she gets in her bed, we read a prayer that is own her wall, we pray, then she cuddles her covers up around her face and I kiss her goodnight, tell her I am in my room right by her, say our I love you’s and she goes to sleep.  Now I am learning to go to sleep then too if I can  Some have ask how we are doing so thought I would blog it  Steve and I are starting a study group at Journey Church, this Tuesday is orientation to see who wants to come, it is a 12 step group, like I have done before, excited about it, God will work on different areas in my life plus the some of the same areas  waiting to see what He does.  I will co lead and my friend Sherry will be the leader of the women's group.  Journey Church is really a family to me, it is our fourth Birthday as a church!!  If I am not there I so miss it and will usually do what ever I can not to miss it, going to miss tomorrow but know I need this alone time with my hubby….with that said he is laying here snoring   we are laying on a sectional he is on one end and me the other we have watched NCIS since noon and its 5:47 its called being a slug……..hugs

Going to make it:)

Lord Help, Steve and I can barley walk, we have worked so hard getting everything moved and this house ready, we laid in bed and said can you believe we did all that today??? It has to be the Lord giving us the strength, sure can tell I am older, I hurt all over the other night, today it hurt to walk, felt like I had been to boot camp:) which I need:(

All is going well with the move, mother appears to be really happy, she keeps her self busy, speaking of busy my work has been crazy busy which I am thankful for:) The first night I was up and down like a yoyo checking on her, I really wanted her to sleep in her room and bed, the second night I was a little better:) now with the baby monitor I can go to sleep and not miss a breath:) love those monitors!

Just wanted to update you, we are all doing good:) keep my aunts grandson in your prayers, Gavin he needs them:) hugs and nite

Our Journey so far

Seven years ago mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, we had a MRI of her brain that showed the plaque build up in the back of the brain,then we had more testing done that show early Alzheimer's, at this time we started seeing Dr. Joe Bradley who specialized in this, we began Aricept, which gave her a upset stomach real bad, we have done all the meds you can do now, Walt nor her friends would believe this and she would not either, she said never say the word Alzheimer's to me again, as it progressed Walt still felt it was aging, I began to spend more time cooking for them and paying their bills, it came a time when mother weighed 84 pds., Walt was elderly too and it broke me and my sister's heart to leave them alone in their home but Walt would not let us do anymore then we did.  he was a very independent man, he was in a high position when he worked and he was the boss at home.  I begged for them to move near me and had shown them a home to move into, Walt said yes, then when time came said no, I was so upset with him, but there was no arguing with Walt, he said his piece and that was it, I cherish those days now because we worked though a lot  issues that we had, as I told him he needed to learn to accept our love and care because we were who would be caring for him and we did, I am thankful for Alicia who changed his diapers, because I could not do that,  I am thankful to say I have no regrets in how we took cared of him when he broke his hip and was sick.                   this is mother skin and bones, now this is her today We did not realize how sick Walt was till he past away. I did move mother near us in Sherwood at the house Walt had said he would buy. That was in June 2010, it has been a great home for her, she has caregivers 24/7, has not been left alone since his death.  Her disease has progressed, she now can not dress her self, physical hygiene by her self, be left alone, she can still eat but has started choking, she can not carry on a conversation but is still very witty and tries.  Mother quit smoking after 50 plus years only positive thing.  Our family has had many bumps in the road going through this process, it has been very heartbreaking and painful. When mother got sick a few weeks back we saw we needed to step up the game plan, saw how quick things can change, I had put her home for sale but had not really worked it, then after she got sick I knew it was time to make the move to move her in with me or make a decision for a nursing home, she is not ready for a nursing home and neither were Kay and I.  Steve and I were spending about 80-100 hours at her home and it was hard on Steve and I, yet I was not sure the move was the right thing, I prayed about it gave it to God, worked her home as I do my other listings and it sold on a cash deal to close in one week.  Needless to say Steve and I got into high gear and got her moved in Her Dr. ordered a hospital bed, which has rails, they do help her pull u to get out of it, but she is doing so much better she does not need them at night, she is oriented to the house, she will read the scriptures on the wall and loves them, mother as a love for God’s word     she loved her closet

Since she has been here ( two Nights ) she has slept real good and loves her room, her bed is twin so she is use to a king size, but seems to have adapted well, she is a survivor, she will adjust to what ever comes her way  I was excited to see her remember her mother and daddy when she saw their pics on her buffet, she knew everyone in pics, first time in a long time for that, she also knew her china cabinet and tea pots, she loves on Steve all the time with hugs, I think he makes her feel secure, I have this china baby doll that is life size, its arms, legs and feet are hard, she loves it and sat it in my little rocker, she wanted it and I said it is yours    In all honestly the move about killed us,   Peyton was a big helper she helped  daddygrand pick things up on the floor and carry things, the  grown kids had to work and we were stressed to the max, Victoria Haley was a God send and she worked like a slave, helped steve move all furniture out of mother’s room and get new in, Had no ideal how strong she is!    stressed with all the unknowns of how its all going to work, but I am so pleased at how it has come about, moving the things I did of mothers was hard emotionally, because I know her next move would be a nursing home and I pray that never happens, I pray she will live the rest of her days here with me and my sister,  My sister has made a room for mother at her house so we can share the care of mother.  I have caregivers still which I need, I work daily and weekends too, Real Estate you are on call 24/7 if you want to be succesful.    Connie and Faye will still help and April comes every weekend then she will spend the night with Kay on Monday nights.  All the new studies say keep Alzheimer's patients with their family, they are even looking into Medicare paying for that instead of nursing home, they say it is cheaper and the patient does so much better, they are happier and get sick less from the study…interesting.  I know mother loves waking up to someone she knows and loves and loves her, also her mind is more stimulated with more people  in the home, she adores the Grand Babies and always loves seeing them.  I have kept a journal on this journey in hopes some day I can write a book, every day has a new twist and sometimes it is really hard to know what to do, the best advice I can give at this point is live in their world, not them live in yours, you make decisions what is best for them, such as a family gathering sounds wonderful until hey are scared because they do not know anyone, I am not sure but my sister and I both thought this would be our last Christmas to take mother to so many places, but never know she may be so much better she will say lets go!!  This is a new adventure for Steve and I and we are looking forward to it, know its not always going to be easy but I do believe with all my heart it is the very best thing for mother 

We have a big shower, last night was mother's first shower here, now she does not like showers they scare her, so you have to get the bath room about 100 degrees, in which I sweat like a fat pig, I was able to get in with her in my PJ’s and manage to stay dry but yet still help her shower, I always leave the door open, we did this shower about a year ago getting ready of her living with us, but she loves the rub down with lotion, I told her last night, tonight was my turn, she said Ok, but I just gave you a shower last week Its a new day in this Journey and I am praying this will be a time of peace and rest and security for mother, knowing she is with her family all the time, and how much she is loved.

It feel s a burden lifted off my shoulders, no more keeping up two house holds, that was getting old, going to the store once, only doing one yard, cleaning one house it will save mother a lot of money too Care givers will still be about the same, I have her room set for in later times when needed I can put a recliner in there for the care giver or a twin bed, trying to stay one step ahead of the game as Lou Holtz book says do…so far so good.  Change is never easy, there are many fears with change so this has been hard on my sister and I, so keep us in your prayers……hugs and hope this helps anyone else going through this in your life….